[Offendedness]

I have a wall in my room where I write down the names of people to pray for, things to give thanks for and goals or just things that I want to keep on my mind. I just wrote a new one down:

"Going into 2017 I refuse to be offended"

Offendedness.

We carry so much of it. We expect people to read our minds and know how offended we are by something small they said that triggered a negative emotion that we have a poor response to because of a bad experience we had when we were a child and since there is no possible way for them to know about that experience or my reaction to that word they should have read my mind and known that I was offended. But now I'm going to try my best to hold it in and not show them hoping that at the same time they will have no clue I am feeling this turmoil inside they will also somehow decide to say sorry for something they have no clue about.

Offendedness.

I once heard a wise man say "Offendedness is the one thing that will steal your calling" and I think that is a very true statement. Because offendedness has a way of getting us more focused on the problem than the solution. It has a way of attuning our ears more to the birds chirping than the conviction and drive we have deep inside that we must pursue and go after this thing we are so passionate about. It has this way of keeping us in a constant mindset of distraction and finding more things that will offend us so that we can prove to some unknown judge or council that we deserve to be the most offended out of anyone. And even if we do win that prize what does it prove? That we had the most odds stacked against us? Because last I checked if you're gonna win a game you have to focus on defeating the odds rather than pointing out to everyone how many odds there are. That sounds more like you're preparing to lose.

Offendedness.

It's so deeply rooted in our culture that we often don't even recognize it. We are told in adds, we are told by social media that it's our right, we deserve to be offended! There's a difference between standing for justice and standing for being offended though. Often times the big teller is Action. Martin Luther King, Jr didn't talk about how offended he was he shared his vision of hope for the future with others. He literally impregnated people with hope. He gave them a glimpse of a better world. Offendedness rests in the same world and apathetically says "nothings gonna change but I deserve to be felt sorry for".

Now I'm going to leave you with a challenge: REFUSE to be offended in 2017, talk through things with people, learn to communicate what you are feeling inside and have never brought to the surface. You'll be surprised by how receptive people are and how much people wished you brought that to light sooner. And just choose not to be offended. It's a choice. For some people it's easier than others. Some people have much more stacked against them, which makes it something that you own that much more. There is SO much more for you on the other side when you refuse to lose the battle to offendedness. 

Good night ladies and gentlemen. Tell your mom how much you love her tomorrow. It will mean more than you know. Over and out.

May your love be strong,

Joey